Ruth's 12th Birthday
Sunday (26th January, 2014) would have been Ruth's 12th birthday had she lived. Lou finds these days really, really, hard, and I find it really, really, hard to watch her suffering so much. Our pain is divergent at these times. For me, it presents an exercise in brinkmanship, hiding from the pain that threatens to engulf me, whilst acknowledging that it is a reality. For Lou, it is a time to embrace the sorrow and allow the waves of melancholy to breach her mental defenses for a few hours, cry a few tears, and indulge thoughts of what she should be doing with Ruth on this day.
Lou bought a beautiful helium balloon bearing the legend "Happy Birthday". This was for John to let go outside. Our typically boisterous ten-year-old musters great dignity on such occasions and always surprises us both with the seriousness he displays and the gravitas with which he treats them. Looking somber, he said a little prayer; he knows she is in Heaven, safe with all our family, and he hop…
Lou bought a beautiful helium balloon bearing the legend "Happy Birthday". This was for John to let go outside. Our typically boisterous ten-year-old musters great dignity on such occasions and always surprises us both with the seriousness he displays and the gravitas with which he treats them. Looking somber, he said a little prayer; he knows she is in Heaven, safe with all our family, and he hop…